apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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