You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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