Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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