I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize