how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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