You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
