uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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