please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
