I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
