ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
