The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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