please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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