Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
