Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
