Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
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