my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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