when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
