My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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