Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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