we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
