Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize