Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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