one might say we're banned from that church
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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