i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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