Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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