I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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