y did u give ur computer a hand job?
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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