You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?