we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
It's rum buckets o'clock
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.