that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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