ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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