ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
