Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
her vagine was all disorganized.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I have post one night stand depression
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