I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize