This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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