Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
