But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
