If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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