My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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