hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
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