You're my little dorito
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
