I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
