Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
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