I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
there is puke in my bra ... again
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