Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
