seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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