No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots