During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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