dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
