My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
she told me i tasted like america
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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