Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
