Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize